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- Page navigation anchor for Why do we cry?Why do we cry?Thanks to Charlotte Sidebotham for her insightful piece on crying.Darwin seems to have been insensitive on this human expression and could not have known how important that expression of feeling can be in the consultation.As my hearing slowly deteriorated towards the end of my working life, I found it helpful to be able to ask a patient to repeat something they had just said in increasing sotto voce and which I had not quite grasped. It indicated to me that the person had something that was really important to them during the conversation.Repetition so often then lead to tears.As well as being moved myself I was then able to move the consultation constructively on knowing that we were communicating well between us and leading to a way forward with the presenting problem.Thanks, Charlotte,Competing Interests: None declared.
- Page navigation anchor for Why do we cry? Are tears 'purposeless'?Why do we cry? Are tears 'purposeless'?
In the April journal, Dr Sidebotham writes an excellent article about crying.1 As a retired, introverted, male GP for whom crying is not part of their emotional repertoire, patients’ crying during the consultation has been difficult.
Many patients would comment, “Sorry, I didn’t mean to cry.” There is the possibility that crying can be a cause of at least embarrassment, if not possibly shame or humiliation in the consultation. I found that if I noticed the moistening of the eyes, the lip changes and changes in texture of the voice that commonly precede crying, and either simply passed over a tissue, or reflected to the patient, “You are crying more”, this would be greeted with an emphatic and seemingly grateful, “Yes!” and we could move on, and crying did not physically happen during the consultation. However, I think emotionally it had taken place, and the patient knew that their suffering had been recognised.
Crying is important. But crying during the consultation may be a sign of poor consultation skills, of cues missed or not acted on. Lazare’s article on Shame and Humiliation in the Medical Encounter2 is still a challenging and relevant read!
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1. Sidebotham. C. Why do we cry? Are tears ‘purposeless’” Br J Gen Pract 2020; DOI:103399/bjgp20X709049.
2. Lazare. A. Shame and Humiliation i...Competing Interests: None declared.